"Me and alcohol have a love/hate relationship. We're in a fight right now, but we're making up tonight." - Unknown

Tuesday, April 27, 2010


Thank you Claud for nominating me for The Beautiful Blogger Award!!! Soooo nice of you!

The rules are - link back to the person who tagged you, nominate 7 other bloggers and list 7 facts about yourself.

And the nominees are (drum roll please):

Canvas Cosmetics
Makeup By TiffanyD
Swingin to my Own Sound
Welcome to the Jungle

Chef Cameron
P.S. We Got Dicks Like Jesus

Seven rando facts:

1. I almost drowned in a lazy river when I was ten
2. I'm scared of the dark
3. I have watched Superbad more times than a person should
4. I have a problem with laughing.. as in, I laugh at literally everything
5. I have a problem with being serious, hence number four
6. I used to be addicted to scratch tickets when I turned eighteen
7. I have probably spent about a hundred bucks playing the arcade game Stack 'Em

Friday, April 9, 2010


Well, there is absolutely nothing good about final exams, everyone knows that. However, what I am looking forward to the most is the SECOND I am done my last exam, I will be celebrating with a shot of rum... and then a lot more shots later on that night. Sadly, what I am trying to break to you as quickly and pain free as possible is that I probably won't be blogging as much as I normally do because of exams. I know, I know, I cried a little bit when I heard the news too. Don't worry, I'll be coming back with a shit load of epic material for you guys. OH, Jen's birthday is on the fifteenth, so that means we're going out and then I'll obviously write a post about our amazing night. So, my dear friends, this will be it for a little bit. My last words to you: always remember to pull your friend's hair back when she is puking.

Good Day =)

Thursday, April 8, 2010


I decided to write a special post for those of you who are unfamiliar with the game of Flip Cup. I realized that I talk about it 24/7 and that some people may not even know what it is. Let me just say, the skill of Flip Cup is one that is acquired over much needed practice and cannot be played unless it is under the supervision of at least one expert of the game. Flip Cup has very simple rules and once you learn how to play the game, you can add in little things to perfect the game (a song, team names etc). Here are the rules of Flip Cup:

1. You need an equal amount of people on each team
2. Each player must have the same amount of alcohol in their cup
3. Chanting is a must

This is how you play the game:
The players from each team is paired up with a member from the opposite team. The purpose of the game is to be the first team to have all players consume their alcohol and flip their cups before the other team. The most suitable cups for this game is just your standard beer cups (these are recyclable, by the way). Once the player before you has completed their flip successfully, it is your time to shine and flip that cup in one try.

Play responsibly.


I know you're all probably wondering how I have such epic drunken nights. Well, there is a lot of planning and preparation that goes into having the perfect night full of intoxication. I have broken down my routine that I do every single time before I start to drink and it goes a little something like this:

Rule One: LCBO
The perfect night out always starts with the right choice of alcohol. When picking the alcohol you will be consuming for the night, you must keep in mind a couple things: 1) you are what you drink, 2) it's cool to spice it up every once and awhile and 3) you can never have too much rum. For me, I know what kind of night I will be having from the type of alcohol that I drink. Rum = always epic drunk times while wine = way too drunk to even know my own name times. People always say not to mix different types of alcohol but I mean, if you gotta play Flip Cup, then you gotta play Flip Cup. I'd say, "the more the merrier" in this case.

Rule Two: Nap/Shower
For girls, one of the best things about a night out is getting ready. A nap is a necessity before you drink your night away. This way, after resting, you will be alert and aware of everything that is going on around you (for the most part). Starting to drink at nine and being tired by ten is never any fun so take at least an hour nap before diving in to the wonderful world of drinking. Next, SHOWER because no one likes a smelly drinking buddy. By doing this, the night will be stink free and you can feel better about yourself the morning after.

Rule Three: Music
Almost the same as picking the right alcohol, picking the right type of music to listen to while you're getting ready and also while you're drinking can make or break your night. If you're going to a club, listen to the latest hits on the radio OR just listen to Gaga on repeat (who the fuck doesn't like her?). If you're going to a bar, listen to some upbeat music, anything that will get you in the mood for some crazy drunkness. Don't be afraid to sing and dance while listening to your music, it will only put you in a great mood and it's always a great workout.

Rule Four: Outfit
Once again, your outfit should fit in to where you are going that night. Wearing a pair of ripped jeans and a wife beater is not appropriate for any club, well maybe The Vault because they are fucking sketchbags there. If you're going to a chill, sit down bar, jeans and a t-shirt is perfectly acceptable, especially when there is karaoke involved. Also, ask your friends what they are wearing so you don't look like a douchebag wearing your prom dress while they're all in flats and a skirt.

Rule Five: Drink, Drink, Drink
No one likes drinking alone, so, when you're planning a night out (or even a night in with drinking), invite some friends over. This is where all the four previous steps come into handy: 1) you have the right alcohol to get wasted with, 2) you are well rested and freshly showered aka ready to part-ay, 3) you have been listening to your favourite music in order to get you pumped for the night and 4) you are dressed for the part and can show off what you are wearing to your friends.

*Please proceed with caution when taking these rules into consideration in order to have the most epic and amazing night ever. Be prepared to have a blast and get pretty fucking wasted. I will not be held responsible for any damage that is caused to buildings, bodies or egos while using this technique. Drink safely, my friends.*

Wednesday, April 7, 2010


For those of you who know me, know that I'm like strangely obsessed with animals. Well, not obsessed, I just really love animals but then again, who doesn't? I never thought to write a post about this event because 1) it was traumatizing and 2) I was not intoxicated when it occurred and figured it was not suitable for my blog. However, my lovely friend Matthew requested that I write a post about the happenings of Sunday, March 21st. Here we go...

*Please note that for privacy reasons, Chester's real name was not used in this blog post.*

It was a gloomy Sunday evening. Steph, Matt and I were studying in the Dining Hall and decided to leave around eleven since we weren't actually getting any work done. As we were walking home, we see our friend Chester who kindly offers us a ride home because it was raining. Being lazy and not wanting to walk home in the rain, we gladly accepted his offer. At this point, everything just seemed perfect in our lives; we left the DH just in time to see Chester walking to his car where he offered to give us a ride when it was raining. By now you're probably thinking that this story is a happy one. WELL, it's not and you should probably be sitting down for the next part. Although, you're obviously sitting down right now because who goes on a computer while standing up? Anyways, we get in Chester's car and it was like there were fucking show tunes playing and all of us were singing along and loving life. We turn onto our street, Matt points out that there is a possum walking across the street and BAM, Chester hits the possum with his car. Not such a big deal right? I mean, it's not like Chester hit this poor little possum on purpose. OH NO WAIT, HE DID! That's right folks, Chester is a possum killer. This murder happened so quickly; he sped up, swerved to the left and then ran over the possum (which I named Ralph). I was in complete shock when this happened and never imagined that I would ever take part in the murder of an innocent animal. As we slowly drove away, I felt one tear roll down my cheek, but quickly wiping it away so the possum killer wouldn't see it. I then lectured Chester about killing a possum and told him that she/he was probably a mother/father going home to see their family. Chester then proceeded to tell me about what they do to chickens in a slaughterhouse as if to defend what he had just done. Don't get me wrong, we all love Chester and everything but, after this, it's hard to trust a guy who killed a possum out of pleasure. We all went to see Ralph after we got out of the car, I brought a shovel and made Chester carry Ralph back to our house. I wanted to bury him but the ground was frozen and so, called the Humane Society the next morning for them to come pick Ralph up. I guess all I can say is that I wish I was drunk when all this happened so I didn't have this memory of the car driving over poor Ralphy and the bump that I felt when we ran him over. This moment in time will forever haunt me and the other occupants in the car that evening. The only advice I have for all of you is that even the nicest people can be possum killers so be careful who you get in a car with.



When: October 2008
Where: WCH/Terrace/Philip's/Literally all over campus
One of the first times that I drank any kind of Absolut vodka was first year university. I wanted to branch out from my Smirnoff drinking days and since I love the taste of peaches, thought that this choice was the right one. This was one month after I turned nineteen, and me being me and being nineteen, I thought that was I allowed to do anything because of my age. Sounds ridiculous, I know, but come on, I was young and didn't know any better. So anywhos, the night I drank this a pretty memorable one and one of my favourite nights from first year. My roommate this year (Kristin) had two friends come up to visit her for the weekend. They all came over to my res room to drink and then we set out for a night out on the.... campus. See, only two of us were nineteen at the time and we didn't do the whole fake ID thing so we just had to make the best of our night without going to any bars or clubs (man, I miss those days... not). Our intention for leaving my room was to make it over to one of the other residences to visit their friend. Did we ever make it over there? Def not. While walking through campus, we made a bunch of friends, people I probably see all the time at school and do not remember them at all thanks to this vodka. We somehow managed to make it to Philip's that night? Don't ask me how hat happened, it just did. We never went inside but just hung around outside the building for awhile because that's what cool people do I guess. We went back on campus, walked in the middle of the road, also a thing that cool people do and then we got stopped by the Special Constables. Not going to lie, I thought it was the police and thought I was so tough talking to them. You're probably wondering why it's such a big deal that the SCs were talking to us. Well, we had water bottle/coffee mugs full of alcohol that we were drinking on our adventure. The cops, I mean Special Constable men asked us what was in our cups and these were our responses: "juice", "gatorade", "rum and coke", "vodka". After hearing that two of us had alcohol in our cups, they were not pleased with us and said, "do you ladies know that it is a $300 fine to have open alcohol in public?" I replied with the line, "sir, it doesn't matter, I'm nineteen, I can drink wherever I want since I'm of legal drinking age." BAD MOVE ON MY PART. They told us to dump out our drinks in front of them and that they would let us off with a warning. Me, being drunk and stupid said, "can I chug the bottle instead of dumping it since that would be wasting alcohol." They just looked at each other, shook their heads and told me that defeated the whole purpose of this. THEN, I invited them back to my res room to continue drinking with us. Sadly, they declined my offer and then we chatted with them for a bit. The one officer actually went to my school and was so proud that he got a degree in Sociology. When he told me that, it was like it was from a movie. He was getting into the car, I yelled, "what did you come to Laurier for?" and he looked at me, proudly said, "Sociology" while nodding his head in approval.
I found it amazing that he was now working as a Special Constable at the same school he got his degree. This encounter with these cops was a kind of wake up call for me and it was then that I realized that even though I was nineteen, I wasn't capable of doing anything that I pleased. However, being twenty, I now realize that THIS age is when I'm allowed to do whatever I want.

Saturday, April 3, 2010


Holy crap, where to start with last night. I can honestly say that last night is up there with one of my favourite drunken nights. Just give me Green Day, dancing and Joe Dog's and I am the happiest girl of life. My friends and I decided to go to Joe Dog's last night because it is probably the greatest bar in the history of the world. Since the LCBO was closed yesterday, I didn't have any alcohol to drink before we went to the bar and so, had to "borrow" some from my parents. My mom told me to check the cupboard where she keeps all the alcohol and that is where I found this wine called Baby Duck. Now, this clearly would never be my first choice to drink but all the alcohol that my parents owned had been consumed by me over various holidays. I decided that I didn't want to spend a billion dollars at the bar so I would have to settle for this weird wine. As I was getting ready, I decided to down a cold shot which wasn't very cold at all. Warm beer + my dislike for beer = disgusting. We went to my friend's house to predrink and this is where things turned for the worst. I cracked open that bottle of Baby Duck and wasn't leaving until it was finished. I've said this before, I'm not a big wine drinker and that Baby Duck wine is the reason why. It wasn't THAT bad but I obviously would have preferred some rum over drinking something that has baby ducks in it. So we leave the house around eleven or so and get to my favourite place on earth, Joe Dog's. I can't even describe to you why I like this bar so much, it's just amazing. We all sit down, I order a double rum and coke, and then the rest of the night is a blur... I'm TOTALLY KIDDING. Last night was amazing, remember? So anyways, the combination of three rum and cokes + one bottle of wine + one cold shot + four shots (one being the waitress' choice) = an epic night. There was a band playing last night and I absolutely loved them. I requested Green Day, obviously and they played She which is one of my favourite songs by them. I must say, Lesley and I are amazing dancers and were actually the only ones on the dancefloor for most of the night. Kris10 and Marie did join us of a bit but it was mainly just her and I. After awhile, it was just me alone on the dancefloor and I still loved my life. They played Blink, Sublime, Kings of Leon.. just absolute amazingness coming from the speakers. My obsession with Green Day is just ridiculous... and it has been going on for so long. Every time the band was done playing a song I would yell "GREEN DAY" at the top of my lungs, wishing and hoping that they would play more Green Day. By the very end of the night, it was just me on the dancefloor and I felt a tap on my shoulder and this like at least sixty year old man standing behind me starting to dance. I was OBVIOUSLY down to dance with him since no one else wanted to get their groove on with me. So, we danced for one song and after it was over, my friends all wanted to leave. Me and my bf introduced ourselves to each other, can't remember his name for the life of me and he offered to buy me a drink... this is where I absolutely died. Never in my life has a sixty year old man offered to buy me a drink. This goes to show the type of people who hang out at Joe Dog's. After declining his offer (so sad), we waited outside for my brother to pick us up. He drove my friend Marie home and this is when I had to get out of the car to puke. He was pulled over on the side of the road, I lept out of the car and just let the grass have it. I felt amazing afterwards, don't get me wrong and the Kraft Dinner that we made when we got home did not help my condition. Kris10 slept over at my house, we Omegled for a bit, talked to some boy who pretended to be from Ireland, it was just superb. I really have nothing witty to say at the end of all this.... sooooo.... I love Green Day?

Thursday, April 1, 2010


I was debating whether or not to write a blog about last night for two reasons: 1) we went to The Vault, a place I absolutely hate and after last night, I refuse to go there ever again and 2) I'm just insanely bitter about the whole Vault thing. I know starting this post off on a bad note is a downer but just thinking about this place makes me angry. I used to go there all the time last year with the girls from my floor, until Michelle and I were banned and since then, I've only been there twice. I must say, two times too many for my liking. I have legit reasons for hating this place and they are as follows:

1) I was "banned" from there
2) Because of number one, that means the owners/bouncers are assholes
3) I was kicked out for talking to a mirror (another story for another time)
4) The layout of the club is absolutely ridiculous (let me expand on this one)

Okay, so number four...
The dancefloor isn't even a dancefloor. At normal clubs, they have a separate place for the dancefloor, aka an ACTUAL dancefloor but here, they don't. Basically, you'll be dancing and people are pushing you out of their way because they're trying to walk by.

I must say, I had a blast predrinking at the Vesia's house (we call our friends the Vesia's because that's the last name of one of the girl's who lives there). I drank my Pink wine, sang a little Gaga and went to.... The Vault. One of the guys who was predrinking with us gave us all tickets to get in for free but we didn't get there before eleven thirty so we couldn't use it. I was stoked when he gave me this card because I didn't want to give The Vault any of my money because I refuse to support them... in any way. However, my five dollar cover is the last thing they will ever be getting from me. I did enjoy the part of the night where I decided to take a stroll down Ezra in my pink homesack. For those of you who don't know what a homesack is, Google it. Just kidding, you won't find it on Google. Just picture a house coat with a zipper. Somehow I managed to do mine up when it was inside out. I can't believe how much I hate The Vault, I truly apologize for those of you who like The Vault but I have one question for all of you, WHY? Believe you me, this place ain't no Philip's, so don't plan on going there any time soon.